{"id":3691,"date":"2011-08-23T04:44:52","date_gmt":"2011-08-23T09:44:52","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/?p=3691"},"modified":"2019-11-25T20:13:04","modified_gmt":"2019-11-26T01:13:04","slug":"send-in-the-clowns-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/2011\/08\/23\/send-in-the-clowns-2\/","title":{"rendered":"Send in the Clowns"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Welcome, dear readers,<\/em> to a new<\/strong> category at Willceau Illo News: Step Away from the Pastry Bag! <\/strong><\/em>I decided to create this category at Willceau Illo News<\/strong> when I noticed a growing plague of frosting encrusted atrocities prominently displayed in bakery windows. I feared that it must be some kind of terrifying trend.\u00a0 All that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good broads do nothing. <\/em>I’m not always good, but the public has to be warned!
\n<\/strong><\/em><\/p>\n

Keep in mind, folks, that all of the cakes are REAL<\/strong>. Nothing has been modified, faked or recreated in Photoshop. I’ve also withheld the bakers’ names and locations to protect them from the wrath of dessert critics and to protect potential customers who might think these concoctions look tasty.<\/p>\n

Okay, with that said, prepare yourself for the first installment of Step Away From The Pastry Bag:<\/em> Send in the Clowns!<\/strong><\/p>\n

BEHOLD<\/strong> the monstrosity of this five-tiered, orange, Tower of Babel populated by reclining clowns! Scroll down in horror!
\n<\/span><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>Isn’t it rich?<\/em><\/a> Yeah, it could kill a diabetic at ten paces!<\/p>\n

I know that clowns were more popular with kids in America during the first half of the 20th Century, but parents would pick up a sheet cake big enough to hold five or six candles and say Happy Birthday Billy.<\/em> What evil genius could conceive of combining a wedding cake the size of a Saturn V rocket with a violently colorful circus theme? The mind boggles! It looks like it could be a replica of the cake from Emmett Kelly’s 1923 wedding to famed trapeze artist Eva Moore.<\/p>\n

Scroll down and have a closer look at the clowns. Take a gander at those exquisite eyebrows, one can only guess that Joan Crawford’s make-up artist ventured out of her Burbank retirement home to pipe in those bad boys.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>It looks as though the pastry chef ran out of butter cream, grabbed an Ateco #806<\/em> tip and attached it to a tube of Aquafresh\u00ae <\/em>toothpaste to pipe the clown’s bodies.<\/p>\n

Nothing like a little ingenuity and a lot of sugar I always say!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Welcome, dear readers, to a new category at Willceau Illo News: Step Away from the Pastry Bag! I decided to create this category at Willceau Illo News when I noticed a growing plague of frosting encrusted atrocities prominently displayed in … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[401,291],"tags":[651,652,654,659,653,655,658,656,3670,657],"class_list":["post-3691","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-mrs-crankipants","category-step-away-from-the-pastry-bag","tag-bakery","tag-cake","tag-clowns","tag-diabetes","tag-disasters","tag-frosting","tag-orange","tag-send-in-the-clowns","tag-step-away-from-the-pastry-bag","tag-tower-of-babel"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1ed1x-Xx","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":4048,"url":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/2011\/09\/06\/hi-yo-sugar-away\/","url_meta":{"origin":3691,"position":0},"title":"Hi – Yo, Sugar! Away!","author":"Mrs. Crankipants","date":"September 6, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Mrs. Crankipants here, with another installment of Step Away From The Pastry Bag! As much as I would hate to beat a dead horse, our friend Flicka in the photo above, looks as dead as Britney Spear's career. I'm sure that the artiste with the bag of butter cream meant\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Mrs. Crankipants"","block_context":{"text":"Mrs. Crankipants","link":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/category\/mrs-crankipants\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/frosting-horse.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/frosting-horse.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/09\/frosting-horse.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4717,"url":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/2011\/10\/25\/goblin-cake\/","url_meta":{"origin":3691,"position":1},"title":"Goblin’ Up Cake","author":"Tina Garceau","date":"October 25, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"It certainly wouldn't be Halloween without a cake to celebrate the occasion! This spider topped beauty is giving me a case of Halloween-orexia! It has all of the necessary components of horror - a jack-o-lantern face, a dismembered arachnid, and lots of fang rotting, wax lip licking sweet orange icing.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Halloween"","block_context":{"text":"Halloween","link":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/category\/halloween\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/cakecloseup.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/cakecloseup.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/cakecloseup.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4552,"url":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/2011\/10\/05\/leaves-brown\/","url_meta":{"origin":3691,"position":2},"title":"The Leaves of Brown?","author":"Mrs. Crankipants","date":"October 5, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"The leaves of brown Came tumblin' down, remember In September in the rain. Except that it's October! Today's pastry de resistance is this rose covered beauty accentuated by brown leaves. Who knew dead leaves were decorative? Except that they look less like leaves and more like what my lazy, chihuahua\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Mrs. Crankipants"","block_context":{"text":"Mrs. Crankipants","link":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/category\/mrs-crankipants\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/rosecake-web.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/rosecake-web.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/rosecake-web.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":5044,"url":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/2011\/11\/04\/happy-childrens-day\/","url_meta":{"origin":3691,"position":3},"title":"Happy Children’s Day?","author":"Mrs. Crankipants","date":"November 4, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Welcome to another edition of Step Away From the Pastry Bag! If my online translator did right by me, the text on this cake by the butter cream Palmer Method drop out says, \"Happy Children's Day\"! According to Wikipedia: Children Day, as an event, is celebrated on various days in\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Mrs. Crankipants"","block_context":{"text":"Mrs. Crankipants","link":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/category\/mrs-crankipants\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/clownangle.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/clownangle.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/11\/clownangle.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":4620,"url":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/2011\/10\/12\/disney-pixar-edition\/","url_meta":{"origin":3691,"position":4},"title":"The Disney Pixar Edition","author":"Mrs. Crankipants","date":"October 12, 2011","format":false,"excerpt":"Welcome, dear readers, to another edition of Step Away From The Pastry Bag: The Disney Pixar Edition! At first glance, it would appear that our main characters Lightning McQueen and Mater are about to face-off in a round of chicken. However, on closer inspection, Mater seems somewhat hesitant about driving\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Mrs. Crankipants"","block_context":{"text":"Mrs. Crankipants","link":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/category\/mrs-crankipants\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/MaterCake.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/MaterCake.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/10\/MaterCake.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":19843,"url":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/2015\/10\/26\/the-pastry-bag-is-mightier-than-the-sword\/","url_meta":{"origin":3691,"position":5},"title":"The Pastry Bag Is Mightier Than The Sword","author":"Tina Garceau","date":"October 26, 2015","format":false,"excerpt":"Our friend Dan is retiring at the end of this week, and I was asked to make a cake to celebrate this momentous occasion. The hostess asked that the cake read \"good luck dan\". Now, if you're familiar with the birthday cake portion of this site, you may have noticed\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Lovin' from the Oven"","block_context":{"text":"Lovin' from the Oven","link":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/category\/lovin-from-the-oven\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/GoodLuck.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/GoodLuck.jpg?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/10\/GoodLuck.jpg?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3691","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/11"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3691"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3691\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3691"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3691"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/willceau.com\/news\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3691"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}